Goin though the big D

Deep Breath..... I guess the time has come, what I never wanted in a million years for my life. It appears I have no choice in the matter. Cameron and I are getting divorced.. Just saying feels like a dirty word.. We are in the 20th Century and with all the people getting divorced, I had always thought and hoped it would not be me. Not to say I think it is wrong, but I didn't really view it as a possibility, I always thought if I fought hard enough, I wouldn't be one of the statistics. I guess now I am changing my view on what I wanted in life or what I think my life will look like in say 10 years. The only thing I see is the fear of the unknown, but the suttle thought of wait, I am strong I can do this, because I have to do this.
What I want the most are that Alex will grow up loving both his parents, and come out on the other side of this a happy well adjusted kid. I know that life will get easier as time goes by. I also know that kids from divorce can grow up to be well adjusted.. I did, Cameron did, and others I know have been raised in split family homes, and have been ok.. I feel lucky that Cameron is a good dad and that I feel like he will be a constant in Alex's life. We both have the same goal in regards to Alex, and that is his well being. I guess that is all I have for the time being.

Just the news I guess

Well once again it's been a while. Seems to be how it goes with me. So list of updates in my world, alex is sleeping in a big kid bed and tonight was the first night in the two weeks he's been in it that he has fallen out. I am pretty sure he slept through it. He was crying but not awake he probably just thought it was a bad dream. Other news we are also working on potty training, I just say I got my work cut out for me. Example: today as Cameron was attempting to show him how to pee standing up, aiming at the cheerios when done Cameron says, " ok,Alex now that your done u got to shake your....." then looks ak me as says, " what are we gonna call "it"?" I broke out laughing, I couldn't stop all because we need to figure out what non anatomical name to refer to my sons, well u know. If u know me u know I have an adversion to that word and most other p words refering To the nether region. So any way that's potty training ...:)

in other news not really anything I can come up with possibly because I am to tired to think. Off to bed check back in soon!

been a while again.

lets see... I don't know that there really is a ton of new things in the Clelands life, just the regular busyness of summer. We are getting excited to go on vacation in a little over a week, that will be nice get out of town and head to Texas, I got to say though, as nice as it is to go away, I am not sure Texas is my favorite state. But I am and have always been a believer that it isn't where you go that makes the trip it is what you do. This will be with all the Reguladores, so it should be great fun.
I know I have said it before but alex and the terrible twos are in full effect! I get told no, and not to talk back to my 2 year old? Oh my and the temper tantrums are ridiculous, but even as obnoxious as he can be he is still the sweetest thing ever. and I am amazed at how well he talks and how well he understands almost everything. He now gets the milk out of the fridge for me.. eeks that isn't my favorite thing he does, but he is showing me every day that he is becoming more and more independent. again something I am not ready for.
This week on sunday we had a water fight out side Alex with the hose no one is safe! But it was a blast! Most fun I have had in a long time. He was running after us then he wanted us to get him.. Good times.

Ok thats all that is on the top of my head for now... Catch ya on the flip side!

Running

Ok so I have decided I am going to attempt the Omaha 1/2 Marathon in September. I did some reading and apparently you are supposed to be able to run 30 min w/o stopping before you can do the actual training.. So Last week I decided to hop on the treadmill and see what I could do, fairly confidant that I could do 30 min w/o stopping. WRONG. I was very disappointed, I can go for an hour on the elliptical and feel great, apparently that isn't good enough. So my 1st run was a 5 min run 2 min walk rinse, lather repeat. The very next day I decided that was ridiculous so I was going to try again this time 12 min 2 min walk, rinse, lather repeat. Then came time for running outside 1st time this year, and 1st time in a while. So I went to Holmes lake with My aunt Mary (avid runner) and my cousin and sister. Well my aunts version of running slow is about a 8 min mile. My version of running slow is a 12 min mile. (does anyone else see a problem here?) But we decided the dam is about a mile, and we did 2 miles in 24 min and that included a 2 min walk, so not the worst ever but not all that great either. So Sunday I decided to go for a run on my own. don't know how far it is, I am guessing 3.5 to 4 miles, I ran from perkins, at 17th, along 17th to hwy 2, picked up the bike trail and followed it to 27th street. Then turned north on 27th and took that to vandorn (only stopped to check the Ipod and walk from stockwell to bonacum) Then went from vandorn and headed back west down vandorn to 22nd street and winded though the neighbor hood back to my house. I was so happy with the run. even thought I am sure it was the slowest mile pace ever, I still did it with out stopping it took me about 40-45 min.

Ok so on other news, my sweet little boy is starting to get a sweet little attitude, and is telling me NO, or I don't want you to do that... and is becoming a little more than annoying. I know that it is the age and a phase but I don't know that I really like this behavior. I love the age that he is, he is getting into stuff figuring out how things work but does the attitude have to come with it? UGH...

Trying to think if I have any other great news. I have none that I can think of. Same ole stuff another day.

Been a while

Well it has been a while over a month actually, I would like to say I was super busy with big important things, but no such luck. I've been busy but not with big important things. Playing softball and volleyball, and now I have decided to try and run a 1/2 marathon. (this is new) Otherwise scrapbooking, working out, work, Alex, you know that general stuff. Alex is getting so big and now thinks he is old enough to talk back, do what he wants, and throw temper tantrums in 2 years old fashion. He is a copy cat, says things like, "Come her dear," Got that from Cameron, and he also now when he is doing things he shouldn't do will turn around and look at you with out skipping a beat, say, "what" like I am not doing anything I shouldn't be. But also is getting his own personality even more than before, very cuddly kid, I love it, also loves to still play basket ball, he is doing gymnastics, which he is loving. We went swimming a couple times this week and he trys to swim with his flotties on by him self. and doens't hold on to you the whole time. He is just growing up so fast. I think I am going to start giving him coffee and put heavy books on his head to keep him from growing up... Ok I don't really think that would work but I am really enjoying this age, tantrums as all, he is just so amazing.

SO other notes, started training for the 1/2 marathon, in September in Omaha. I am actually in pre-training, I have to be able to run 30 min w/out stopping before I start, and I suppose if I ran really really slow I could do 30 min with out stopping, but I was trying to maintain a 10 mph pace, and I wasn't quite there I am closer to a 11:30 mile right now. but that is on the treadmill so outside will be very different. I actually think out side will be better, at least for me because there is stuff to look at markers to work towards, an end in sight that sort of stuff. So I guess we will see how it goes. I am excited, to do it so I can say I ran in a marathon, also to prove to myself that I could do it.

In other news Cameron is involved in the protectors challenge, which is a weightloss/fitness challenge, he is very excited I think it will be awesome for him. He is hoping to look very different in 3 months. SO good luck Cameron!!

Ok well I guess that is my ramblings for the day.

Nothing To Exciting

hmm.. it is hard for me right now to be excited about much, I seem to be in a funk. Even the Gymnastics meet that are this week are only bringing a mild level of excitement when normally I would be trough the roof with excitement. Sigh Oh well, I am sure I will snap out of it soon.... I hope. Alex is doing very well, talking up a storm, and singing along with songs. It is cute but with the cute is coming temper tantrums. Even though they are not totally 100% terrible, they are defiantly not fun. It is like he is PMSing all the time.. but I forgive him for one he is two, and for two, there are times I would love to just lay down and throw myself a little tantrum. Sigh.
Alex is growing up way to fast, he climbs into the high chair all by himself, and he gets in the fridge all by himself and leaves the door open... We are trying to get the potty training thing going, but it doesn't seem to work so well yet, he just says, after words, "mommy I poopy" So at least he knows??? We have tried to sit on the big boy potty a couple times, but not to much excitement, even with the bribe of treats. Hmmm maybe it doesn't work so much like a dog. lol Oh well I miss every stage he is growing out of but love every stage he grows into!

That's all for now.
Holly

Desert Land in Califorina

Alright so Monday I get the pleasure of being told by Cameron that he decided to buy land in Califorina. Holy cow, didn't even consult me, nothing. And he bought it on ebay. Eeeks. But for what ever reason I am not all that mad. Like I told him there is probably a list of ten things that would make me more angry than this. SO now we own land in Califorina in the desert, not sure what we are going to do with said land, but it is sort of close, to the beach, vegas, LA, and Pheniox. so Camp and sight see I suppose will be the plan.

Otherwise Alex is doing gymnastics, and it is awefully cute! He had his 2 year checkup, and is doing great 97 % height and 78% for weight and ahead of schedule for talking and gross motor development, proud mom!!! however cameron said that that will last until he starts liking girls, then we are done. lol We will see creighten prep (all boys school here he comes) lol ..

and I am officially another year older today! sigh, oh well I still feel young.